Saturday, March 24, 2012

Just More of the Same

For all practical purposes.....there are two Germanys in operation today.  Americans may be a bit shocked and surprised at this comment....but it's the simple truth.

When things unraveled in East Germany in the late 1980s....the eventual outcome was reunification in 1990.  If you compared the two Germanys in 1990.....it was a pretty big difference.  You had a modern infrastructure in West Germany, with almost everything rebuilt since 1945.  Buildings were brightly painted and roads were in first class condition.  Most West German towns had ongoing projects to spruce up things and local residents were all proud of their city or town.

East Germany in 1990....was a different sort of place.  Roads and bridges needed rebuilding.  There were still bombed out areas left over from 1945.  When folks did renovation on their house....it was a self-help project with mixed results (half of the house might look 1955 in appearance, and the other half like some 1985 mixed-up renovation project).  

One of the big promises out of 1990 from the new unified German government....was this massive infrastructure cash flow.  They would rebuild East Germany.....even if it took decades.  Well....we are now over twenty years into this effort, and some German communities in the western part of the nation....are feeling some pains that they haven't had full cash flow on their projects in twenty years.  Hundreds of billions have flowed into the eastern portion of the country, and frankly....some folks think it's to just be "fair" about funding.  

I read a comment this week....that around forty percent of people living in the eastern regions of Germany....still feel like a second-class citizen.  It's been two decades, and things haven't changed much in the minds of these folks.  Yes, we can kinda admit that no company out of the eastern half of Germany has even made it into the German top thirty businesses.  And we can admit that hundreds of small villages in the eastern regions of Germany have only seen their roads paved and the public buildings painted.....without any other real construction (like the big towns in the eastern half received).  

For all practical purposes....it's still two German nations.  I suspect in another twenty years....it'll still be two German nations.  

From an American prospective.....it's like going from Atlanta, to some 1-star town in southern Georgia that doesn't even have a stop-light.  We've been living in a split society for over two-hundred years, and never thought much about it.  Occasionally, some media guy will tell us that it's a shame....we agree.....and life just goes on.

I suspect Germans are mostly the same way.  You can talk about two German society all you want.....but tomorrow....it'll be the same way.  

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

The Non-Moving German

There's a prospective that an American gets of Germans and the potential of moving around.  Americans are one of the most mobile societies on the face of the Earth.  You finish high school, and move three states over to attend college.  You graduate from college and move two states over to the first job.  Eighteen months later, you find a new job, and move one state over.  Four years later, you move to a better job on the opposite coast.  You marry and move twenty miles into the first house.  Three years later, you sell that house and move again.  By age 65, a typical American probably moves at least ten times.

Germans don't move much, and that becomes this little topic of discussion.

A German kid will usually stay in Mama's "hotel" as long as possible....maybe up to age twenty-two....when they feel they have enough money or status.....to live independently.  They rarely move more than thirty minutes driving from the town that they grew up in.

The next ten years?  Well.....the German guy might get a girlfriend, and maybe move into her place....but it's still a pretty local situation.  So by age sixty-five, I doubt that a German typically moves more than five times, and it's all generally in the same area.  

Even if you were a German university graduate.....you aren't that likely to pack up from Munich and move to Berlin....unless you had some big impressive science degree and had a offer from a unique company that really enticed you.

The truth is....Germans don't like to take stressful moves.  By the time you add up moving pains, the stress of looking for a new apartment or house, and the problems of finding the right size curtains.....it's a colossal headache.

So when you arrive in a German town and start to notice your associates and neighbors.....they are all from the local area, and most haven't moved more than a couple of miles from where they graduated school.  They know all the local gossip and stories....simply because they stayed long enough to hear every single story told.

You can call it an anchor, or whatever.....but Germans are happy this way.  They've got enough stress in life already....so why ask for more?

Sunday, March 18, 2012

A DWI in Germany

Not that it's one of the top 500 things to know in Germany....but you might be curious.

A level of .05 is enough, to get you a DWI in Germany.  Your license generally gets taken on the spot, and you get carted off to the jail to be bailed out.  Within a couple of weeks, you will end up at a court appearance, and there's this summary read aloud.  The cops will be smart enough to take a blood test (which you must submit to) at the scene.  The results will be absolute.

At this point, the judge will give you a choice of a fine or days in jail.  Most Germans will select the fine.  Unless you are mostly broke....that's about the only reason not to pick the fine.

Then the judge discusses the period of your license being lost.  It's always six months.  You can argue all you want....but it doesn't matter.  If you need a ride to work....you either get your relatives to drive you, or you start walking or riding public transportation.

The fine?  Well.....usually a couple thousand Euro.

The second DWI?  Life gets to be a bit miserable at this point.  Usually, it's a two-year loss, and the fine goes into a pretty hefty range (over ten thousand).

Hiring a lawyer to fight the DWI?  If they took the blood test, it's a iron-clad case....you simply are burning up your cash in hiring a lawyer.

What is the potential for the cops stopping you?  Well, this gets to be interesting.  During most daylight hours....it's like a one-percent chance of the cops having a random checkpoint.  Friday and Saturday evenings?  The numbers go up to a thirty-to-forty percent chance of a random checkpoint.  They will set up various points within the heart of a city, or along the major roads leading out of a town.

My advice is simple....if you want to really want to consume more than one beer or wine in Germany....you ought to select some pub in your neighborhood, and just walk over.  Spend four hours there, and drink five or six beers.....and just stumble your way home.  If you drive out and are the driver for the evening....your honest limit is maybe one beer, and flip over to sodas, tea, or fizzy water.  These guys don't kid around about DWI situations.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

The Difference between 1978 and 2012?

I was fairly naive about Germany when I first arrived in January 1978.  Things have changed a bit, and I offer my ten observations.

1.  Older Germans back in 1978.....were agreeable to one or two "real" baths a week.  This is no joke.  A guy would wash himself off with a washcloth after work, dab some aftershave on as he headed off to work, and take his official bath on Saturday night.  It wasn't the standard for most Germans, but I worked with a number of older guys who did it that way.  Today....everyone bathes on a nightly/morning basis.  Maybe that's a positive thing.

2.  In 1978, there was just plain beer.  There wasn't any diet beer or low-cal beer or cherry-flavored beer.  Today, you can imagine any kind of beer, and it exists.

3.  In 1978, there were telephone booths on every street corner.  You had to carry change with you on a constant basis.  Today, in a village of 2k residents?  There might be one booth in the whole town.....maybe.

4.  In 1978, you had to pay your phone bill down at the telephone office in every village.  Today, you can have the money deducted from your bank account.

5.  Every village in 1978, had a post office.  Today.....there is a small stand at the local grocery....open for four hours and that might be the only local place to mail your packages or letters.

6.  Women in 1978 Germany....on occasion....wore these stupid leopard-like tights, that made them all look trampy.  A really trampy German gal would have a mink jacket with the leopard-like tights.  Today, it's hard to find a trampy-dressed German gal.

7.  There was teeny-rock for the 19-year old kids or younger......or Frank Sinatra-like music for the folks over forty.  Super Tramp and disco were just about to arrive in 1978.

8.  In 1978, it was practically impossible to find a store with AC in the Frankfurt area.  Stores were shut down by 6PM, and Saturday openings for store consisted of four to five hours max.  Today.....stores are open six days a week.

9.  A big-scale vacation in 1978 for a German....consisted of driving the family car south across the border into Italy, or across France...to Spain.  This was a big deal.  Today?  Folks fly to Thailand or Kenya.  

10.  A great evening meal consisted of a schnitzel, pommes frites, and a beer, in 1978.  Today?  It's still a schnitzel, pommes frites, and beer.  The price may have gone up 200 percent, but you still can't beat the meal.

Ten Things About Bratwursts

1.  Yes, it is a over-sized sausage of sorts.  It's the common dish of Germans on the run....pluck down around 1.50 Euro, and you get the bratwurst on a bun, with mustard.

2.  Even though a crispy Bratwurst looks pretty bad....you will find that a under-cooked wurst is not a good idea.  So a little crispy isn't bad.

3.  There are various wursts that you can cook like hotdogs, in hot water.  Personally, the open grill Bratwurst is the best.

4.  There are forty types of wurst.....but the Bratwurst is the general all-purpose wurst that just about everyone will accept.

5.  Your three possible things to accompany the Bratwurst?  Potato salad, sauerkraut, or pommes frites (fries).  To drink with it?  Well....beer is overwhelmingly preferred but a soda is ok.

6.  A bad Bratwurst?  I will say this.....there are cheap ingredients and you could stop at a local spot....to find an awful cheap Brat, and you know by the second bite....it just won't get any better.  Toss it away and accept the fact that you had a cheap one.

7.  Do not, as an American, try to compare it to a hot dog. It simply doesn't compare like that.  When you make some silly statement like you think it's similar to a hot dog.....you simply get the German next to you all upset and they start arguing that you don't know anything.

8.  Yeah, the German bun is a quarter of the size of the Brat, and it's always been that way and it'll never change.  Usually, you dab some heavy mustard on both ends and eat your way down to the bun.  And remember, there's usually two mustard.....the regular and hot.

9.  It does have an element of grease to it.....so if that generally bothers you.....don't eat it.

10.  If you buy them at the grocery....remember, there are pre-cooked and uncooked Brats.  The uncooked ones are pink in nature, and you really must cook them through.  If these are pre-cooked.....you need to grill them a little....as a minimum.  Never eat a uncooked Brat raw.....my own humble advice.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Another Shooting Story

Over near where I lived for fifteen-odd years in the Kaiserslautern area....they had a shooting on Monday, in Weilerbach.  The best we can say is that a older guy (around 78) walked into the town's only doctor's office, run by two older doctors (63 and 48, but don't ask me why the ages of the doctor matter).  He shot both dead and wounded a nurse in the operation as well.

The old guy takes off on his scooter....shoots wildly at the cops arriving at the scene, drives back to his house and awaits the cop's arrival.  The old guy shoots himself as they break into the house.

The discussion so far?  Talk has it that the old guy had finally be diagnosed with cancer, and wasn't very happy about the situation.  I'm guessing the doctors at the local clinic had scheduled him for tests after enough health issues, and someone had suggested that if it'd been found earlier....he might have survived.  Just a humble guess.

The town now is without any doctors, and for a town of 4,500 folks.....it's a pretty serious issue.  Someone will eventually take over the clinic operation, but that's months away.  So every single clinic for miles around....is going to be a magnet now for these Weilerbach folks.  The chances of being stalled on appointments?  Pretty high, if you ask me.

As for the old guy having a gun?  Well, the cops will check out this whole thing and I suspect that he will be found with a license and right to hold a gun.  His mental stability will be called into question and folks will again ask if it's not time to require yearly mental exams for guys with guns.  

A Shooting Story

Years ago, I had an associate in Germany who had gone out with a real estate person to look at a potential house to rent.  They had pulled up to a stop light with a car in front of them.  My associate began to notice the car in front of them.....rocking back and forth.  Then he and the real estate noted that the couple in the car were literally fighting....fists flying...elbows being jabbed...etc.  Light turns green, and they stop....to drive on.  Probably a husband and wife, but you just don't know.  The thing is....they were able to go up to a major frustration level....fight this out....and then the light turned green, and things simmered down real quick.

The Stuttgart Zeitung newspaper reports an episode from yesterday....some wife (48 years old)...must have gotten into a pretty serious argument while sitting in the car....pulls a pistol while they are driving, and shoots the husband (age 63).  With the luck of things, he's able to bring the car to a halt....stumbles out....but eventually dies from the gunshot wound.

The wife simply walks off from the car, but the cops eventually capture her.  So far, no one is talking over the argument or what drove her to shoot the guy.

My humble guess is that some good defense lawyer will point out several failings with the husband, and the wife was on some kind of medication....and the wife ends up with just a couple of years in prison at best.

The Tax Dilemma

American GI's have always paid taxes.  There's usually a deal or two where you get into a tax-free status....like when you enter a combat zone, but otherwise, you are just like everyone else.

Well....Germany is a bit different.  The German pay-scale, especially for junior enlisted folks, wasn't exactly that great.  So there was this one great enticement....no German taxes.  Usually after a year or two in the German military.....a guy came back into the civilian world, and woke up to this harsh reality of taxes.

In the last day or two, this little rumor has leaked out of the state tax office in Germany, that they are thinking in the next year of changing some rules.  One of the expected changes is to finally tax German GI's.  Naturally, a number of political figures and high-ranking military folks came out suddenly against this idea.

The driving force of this change?  Well....the draft is gone.  It's supposed to be a professional force now, and they've upped the pay-scale a fair bit.  So the tax guys think it's time to be fair and tax even German soldiers.

My humble guess is that this will be fought off and prevented from happening in 2013.....but somewhere down the line in the next ten years....it'll finally occur.  Maybe wages within the Germany military will reach a point by then, that this won't matter much.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Movie Review

This is a movie review for Rubbel Die Katz.  It's been out for a couple of months now.  With German comedies...it's mostly hit or miss, with little in the middle.  This is what I'd consider as a hit.

The basic theme is this German actor who'd like to get a big-time role, and he's finally offered a deal....but only as a woman, and he has to lie his way through the audition to get this role.  His manager, his brother, would do just about anything to get him the job.  The script, I will say....has to bend over backwards in making you think he's a gal.  But it does a decent job.

If you can get this in sub-titles....you might find it fairly interesting.  The curious part of the movie involves the American director.....who acts typically American, and probably steals several of the major scenes in the movie. And the Hitler scenes?  Five-star humor.

So if you have two hours to spend in a kino....I'd recommend the movie.  And this guy, Matthias Schweighofer.....I'm thinking he's got the potential to be a Hugh Grant one day.

Twenty Things About Eating Out in Germany

1.  As you walk in, the waiter or waitress will bring you the menu, and immediately ask as they drop it off....what might you want to drink?  So, you might want to have something in your mind as you sit down.  And no, it's not impolite to just stall the waiter until you've reviewed the menu.  If there is anything of a spicy nature on your plate, you can probably expect to order a second drink.  In this case, I'd recommend a soda or water.  Don't get yourself talked into two or three beers, if you are driving.

2.  Prices are all figured already, if there are taxes, so if you add the drink and meal together, you pretty much have the true cost of the meal.  The tip?  Well....ten percent is about the average.  If this was a table with six to eight people.....you might go up to fifteen percent. If service was lousy, don't tip.

3.  Using credit cards.  The best advice I can give....is use cash.  If this is a big fancy place, they probably can handle credit cards.  The small restaurants in villages....usually don't have the ability to handle credit cards.

4.  Forget about buffet deals.  Some places might offer a breakfast buffet, but don't get high expectations.  A breakfast buffet will consist of thin slices of ham or salami, some hard boiled eggs, various pieces of bread, with jelly or honey.  Germans don't offer hearty breakfast deals....just accept that.

5.  The simple lunch?  Generally, if you were going to eat light at lunch...I'd suggest a salad of some type and maybe a soup (goulash for example).  Most restaurants offer a cold plate for lunch....usually less than five Euro.  If you don't mind a greasy bratwurst....that'd usually work well for a quick lunch.

6.  Ethnic meals?  Mexican restaurants in Germany exist....but I would strongly caution you from having high expectations.  Usually, it's Pakistani guys cooking the Mexican food, with some unusual spices that might not be Mexican.  Thai or Asian?  Well....you'd typically find some Chinese folks running the operation and a decent meal.  If it's an Italian place.....they will likely have an Italian cook, and present a pretty good meal.

7.  Hamburgers?  If you find a German restaurant that offers burgers....don't have high expectations.  It just won't taste the same as you might have had in the US.  I'd stick with German traditional dishes, when in Germany.

8.  Serving food cold.  I've rarely come across this in my twenty-odd years, but it happens.  My advice is to sample it, wave for the waitress, and refuse the meal.  Typically, this happens when you are in a fair-sized group and the waitress was waiting to have everything cooked before bringing it out to the customers.

9.  The sad truth is that you might find a small eight-table restaurant in the middle of nowhere, which serves the best food you've ever eaten.  You discover some sixty-year old grandmother who cooks in the back and uses fresh herbs and home-made sauces.  You might walk into a big mid-town restaurant in Frankfurt, with a fancy menu, and find the food marginal.  You just can't tell with things like this.  Ask friends, neighbors, and associates to recommend places.

10.  Germans do offer desert at the end of meals....but it's traditionally ice cream treats.  You could be talking about another couple of bucks (it won't be cheap).  If you add in the calories for the ice cream....you've probably had enough calories for two entire meals.  As the waiter clears the table from your big meal....they will always pull out the ice cream menu, and dazzle you with big colorful pictures of fancy plates of ice cream, strawberries, blueberries, and cherries.  It'll be hard to turn it down.

11.  Ordered a meal involving ketchup?  Most places bring out a large packet and lay it on the table....not a bottle.  And they will charge you for the packet.

12.  That machine on the wall of the pub that makes the noise?  A German-style slot machine.  Don't get any funny ideas about it paying off if you play.  It's a magnet in small bars for guys walking around with extra pocket money, who are working on their third beer.

13.  The dog sitting by the lady at the table next to you?  Well.....yeah....dogs are traditionally allowed in German restaurants.  I realize it might bother you and Tippy might have fleas, but it's a German thing.  Big-name restaurants don't like dogs sitting at the tables.  But it's absolutely acceptable at all small operations in the country.

14.  Don't expect a heated bathroom in a small German restaurant.  Most have heat, but you can always walk into a small place....need a restroom, and then find yourself in a pretty chilly environment.

15.  If you take three friends into a small restaurant....it's expected that all four of you eat something.  If one of them just says they want a bottle of water (no food), the restaurant could ask the person to leave.  If this is a pub, no worries....drinking of any type (even a Coke) will be totally acceptable.

16.  Your soda choice.  There are some places that you might walk in, and find that there are no name-brand sodas on the menu.  They offer up a no-name Coke-like drink.....which likely doesn't taste like Coke, but it looks like it.  My advice....find an alternate drink, or just ask for bottled water.  Afri-Cola?  Well....it's a Coke-like pretender, which might spark your interest.  You might find one establishment out of twenty that serves the drink....which most would be a pub-like operation.

17.  Eating outside.  It's a big deal to have a restaurant in your village, which offers tables and chairs out in a garden, with tree cover.  It's relaxing and very desirable.  A word of caution, out of every ten outdoor events you might attend.....at least one will feature bees or wasps.

18.  The shot at the end of the meal.  A number of restaurants now offer up a shot of some liquor at the end of a meal.  German tradition is that this will help you digest the meal.  There might be an argument about this health aspect, and it certainly won't be found at a majority of the places you eat.   The alcohol content of your shot?  In most cases, I'd strongly doubt that it crosses the 'strong-drink' line.  We are talking about a low-alcohol shot.

19.  Pizza in Germany is done differently than in American establishments.  It's a thin crust 'pie'.  Most of the pizza sizes are the type that easily fit for one person, so don't be thinking of an extra-large.  As for the spicy nature of pizza.....you might want to be careful about what type of pepperoni  or salami you select.  If you don't like hot spicy pizza....make sure you discuss things with the waitress when you order.

20.  Finally, out on the front door area of the German restaurant is a menu within a glass case.  It's there for a reason.  It will have the entire menu, with the prices.  The sad truth is that you might find a terrific place for food.....which charges a terrific price as well.  Most Germans don't expect to pay more than ten Euro for the majority of meals they eat.  Just edging the price up to twelve Euro for some dish, will upset a few folks, and they won't walk into the establishment.  It may sound funny, but Germans are always out to save a few bucks....even if they don't want to admit it.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

The One and Only

Back around 2001, I was standing on a street in Germany, and this motorcycle passed.  I had this brief moment where I thought I had seen the greatest thing ever invented.  I spent days trying to figure what it was and how it might fit into my life.

It was the BMW C1.  It was a brief life for the C1....from 2000 to 2003.  The basic model was a 120cc, and then came the slightly larger engine.  It was not what you'd call a touring vehicle, or the kind of thing you'd want to drive on the autobahn for long distances.  It was probably a perfect design for suburban environments.

Cost?  The basic model ran around the $6500 range.  If you tossed options on it.....it could have gotten up to $8k.  If you went for the larger engine.....you started to get closer to $10k, which made it kind of silly spending that much money on what amounted to being a hyped-up scooter.

BMW, at least in my mind, had anticipated a strong secondary market.....with growth after the second and third year.  They just didn't get that.  The US market?  Never to be.  By the early part of 2002, it was apparent that it couldn't grow the numbers.  By 2001, they'd sold around 10k of them, and by the end point of production....they'd made it to roughly 13k of these bikes total.

I admired a parked C1 bike once.  I came to realize several limitations with it.  If you got into an accident.....other than a straight head-on situation.....nothing much else helped to improve your odds.  The seat-belt?  That bothered me a bit.  It was a simple over-sized scooter, with an image.  It was an awful big big bike....to be a 120cc type.

So as you stand around on the streets of Germany.....suddenly gazing on this odd scooter approaching you....it's the C1.

Kids, Exams and Vacations

Americans are used to fifty different state examination and graduation requirements.  Germans are used to the same type of situation, except now....some German experts are pushing for a one-nation exam and requirement list.  Presently, it's not moving ahead much.

Presently, you have sixteen German states who regulate and determine exams and schedules.  The schedule are the most critical part of German society today....which determines leave schedules at massive factories and how the German tourist system really works.

You see, when the state of Hessen lays out their school schedule for the next year.....it might correspond with  a couple of states, but it's not likely to match up with more than three or four.  So a major factory within Hessen will say that liberal leave is likely during this four-week period.  If you produce nuts and bolts.....it's very likely that you might ramp up the month before and produce 150 percent of your normal monthly amount, then the production cents goes on a limited operation schedule, and then ramps back up for a big production for a week or two.....to catch up with orders.  It's the German way.

Same way for Christmas.....spring break, etc.

Vacation packages?  Well....if you own a number of vacation cottages up in Denmark.....you have this eight week period when the German states will be in a revolving schedule....so you might pump up the pricing scheme for the entire eight weeks.  If there were only four weeks of vacation for all sixteen German states, then the vacation rental strategy gets pretty screwed up, and your profits get cut.

This vacation dilemma, is what drives a huge amount of opposition to fixing the exam business.  You want a single basic exam that can be readily produced and sent out the week prior to the exams.....so that no one can cheat.  And you'd like for the exam to all occur on the same day so that you have no kids walking around with prior knowledge of the answers.

This German mentality of no-cheating and no-knowledge of the test....drives the bulk of opposition.  Toss in the concern of German political figures over hectic autobahn traffic situations and a tremendous change to vacation pricing if this goes through.....it all means that it likely won't happen.