Schnitzel Republic: German Joke

Tuesday, November 27, 2018

German Joke

German jokes rarely translate well into English, and the laugh-point usually doesn't make sense. My wife came home today and laid out this new joke she heard:

Vidal awoke in the morning and felt this was the most wonderful day in the world, and felt exceedingly happy over being a new resident of Germany....and grateful for Germans having allowed him a visa to stay. So as he started out at 10 AM....he decided that he would personally go up to a German and thank them for their hospitality and allowing him to stay.

So Vidal walked up to a guy on the street and commented over feeling great and being appreciative of his situation in Germany. The guy looked at him and responded...."Sorry, but I'm Albanian."

So Vidal walked up to the next guy on the street and commented over feeling great and being appreciative of his situation in Germany. The guy looked at him and responded...."Sorry, but I'm Russian."

So Vidal walked up to the next guy on the street and commented over feeling great and being appreciative of his situation in Germany. The guy looked at him and responded...."Sorry, but I'm Turkish."

So Vidal walked up to the next guy on the street and commented over feeling great and being appreciative of his situation in Germany. The guy looked at him and responded...."Sorry, but I'm Moroccan."

So Vidal walked up to the next guy on the street and commented over feeling great and being appreciative of his situation in Germany. The guy looked at him and responded...."Sorry, but I'm Afghan."

So Vidal walked up to the next guy on the street and commented over feeling great and being appreciative of his situation in Germany. The guy looked at him and responded...."Sorry, but I'm Tunisian."

So Vidal walked up to the next guy on the street and commented over feeling great and being appreciative of his situation in Germany. The guy looked at him and responded...."Sorry, but I'm Algerian."

Finally, Vidal looked at his watch....10:30. Then he realized....all Germans were at work.

Hint: This is where a German would start laughing.

(comment: for an American, I paused over the telling of this story by my German wife for 10 seconds because cracking a smile and realizing the German humor to the joke.

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About the Collection of Essays

First, note that this is NOT a blog....it's a collection of essays similar in nature to what the Greek Plutarch attempted to write.

Second: NO, there will be no Facebook connection to the essay collection. Besides the negativity with FB, there is just too much potential in the future for censorship with FB.

Third, this log of essays is written by an American (not a German). If you are a German seeking commentary written by a German, on Germans....look elsewhere.

Fourth, I will offer wit and sarcasm on Germany, Germans, Germanology, German political figures, German TV, German beer, German food, German humor (or lack of), German habits, German weirdness, German news, German autos, German brilliance, German stupidity, German customs, German Nazis, German history, and German stubbornness.

Fifth (new), the essays are not about ethnic pathways to your grandfather or great-grandmother who was German. It relates present day Germans. If you are trying to get some understanding to your ancestor who packed up and left sixty years ago from the old 'homeland', then this blog is probably not for you.

I was one of those Americans who did over twenty years of military time....married a German....and eventually returned as a retiree.

I'm one of the few who stood under the German umbrella.....paid German taxes for some years.....German social security.....and felt the various pains like Germans.

So, this is my all-purpose commentary essay, designed for non-Germans mostly (and those Germans who accidentally discover it). I tend to put German culture into the spotlight of sarcasm, wit and humor. I'm simply pointing out the richness and craziness of life in Germany, which even some Germans can't understand.

The amusing thing is that I'm merely repeating the exercise that Mark Twain performed in 1880, when he published "A Tramp Abroad". Various comments were dished out on the Germans....which apparently did not trigger any wars, chaos, climate change, or ill feelings.

Final note: I generally only delete comments that are spam-related, or hype over pure Nationalist Socialist agendas. I generally won't support one-sided arguments/agendas. I also don't think accusations of racism or nationalism are generally proven, and can reflect poorly upon the person making the accusations.